A Conversaton with Elizabeth
1998
Re: Midnight Musings

From:          larry.m.mixson@bvs.com (LARRY M. MIXSON)
To:            Elizabeth
Date:          Wed, 4 Mar 1998 15:02:00 -0800
Subject:       Re: midnight musings
 
Wow, what an outpouring. I should have known that asking you what thoughts go through your mind would bring such. My thoughts also sometimes go to my parents and mortality, particularly the mortality of parents. When I was younger I never thought of my parents dying. It first really came to me when my dad had his heart bypass. The family was leaving his room in the hospital and he held my arm and ask me to stay a minute. He then asked me to take care of mom if anything happened to him. [link 1980 December, Dad]
 
That was 18 years ago and I will never forget it. A year ago next week Julie's mother died and again I was faced with the aspect of my parents dying. It was not quite as personal as having one of my own parents die but it was close. Her mother had gone into the hospital for a hernia operation which went OK and she returned home a couple of days later. The second day at she started having some paralysis in her arm and they took her back to the hospital. That night she had a blood clot in the brain and went into a coma, all brain activity ceased soon thereafter. They elected not to keep her on life support but she did last for about three weeks. That was a very difficult time for my wife. She had had many issues with her mother over the years and for a long time was on barely speaking terms. Julie was fortunate that in the last few years she work on the relationship with her mother and had come to terms with much of it. I am on good terms with my parents and in some ways I am closer than I was when I was younger. At times I wish I lived in Gainesville and could spend more time with them and develop a closer relationship. (a few days of visiting usually gets me over that feeling).
 
My wife and I often have had discussions about the philosophy that one returns to earth to work on "life's issues" and that the people you have relationships with are all part of resolving these issues. The Tenth Insight and its sequels talk about this. The story about Krakhaur sound a lot like a recent Millennium episode in which the parents ask Frank Black (main character) to look for their missing son who disappeared in Alaska. Frank goes to Alaska and tracks the son down in the wilderness. The son had given away all his possessions and was living alone. He had broken his leg and was dying. Frank found him, and brought him back. A few weeks later Frank went visit him in the hospital and found the guy had left to go back into the wilderness. In his journal the son had written something about finding himself.
 
What do I think about when I am alone? Life, career, job, wife, past relationships, current relationships, where I want to be when I "retire" The other night Julie was out late and I was thinking of you and it seem that when I think of you I often think of Bob Dylan's old records so I listened to a couple of them. His Desire and Blood on the Track albums came out those years we were in Gainesville and I associate some of the songs with you/us/our relationship
 
I have not heard of Connie Fowler but I enjoy reading about the early da of growing up in Florida. My grandmother Mixson wrote about a 30 page diary about her early days, she was born in 1901. I'm sure you heard of Marjorie Rawlings who wrote the Yearling in Cross Creek near Micanopy.
 
Yes I been to the Dali Museum (actually in St. Pete.) He has always been one of my favorite artists.
 
I did not know about the upper part of Alabama being so nor have I heard of the Cahaba Lilies. I always picture Alabama being swamp like in the south and much like north Florida in the north.
 
I would have been gone by now but stayed late to get a cell phone. Bel Atlantic has a special employee deal today that I can get a free phone a $9.95 a month service. I don't really need one but at times I did wish had one so I thought what the hell, can't get a better deal after I leave so why not.
 
Till, tomorrow,
Larry

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