A Conversaton with Elizabeth
1998
Blood on the Tracks
From:
Elizabeth
To:
larry.m.mixson@bvs.com
Date:
3/6/98 9:03am
Subject: Blood on the Tracks
On Thursday's I don't have class, and I had just settled down to try
again with Snow Crash when my sister-in-law (my brother's ex-wife)
called to talk. I was starting to enjoy the book. There were some
comments about libraries once being for books and then switching into
the information age. The word puns are somewhat interesting, even the
character's name--Hero Protagonist.[1] While it was
not the point of Donna's call she indicated my mother had gotten much
worse and had not seemed to recognize her the last time she called. That
is not good news. The time I have dreaded is when I go to visit and she
doesn't know who I am. Anyway, my plans are to go either in April or
May. I don't think there's anyway I can move that up and April may be
unfeasible even with Spring Break (I complete my six months here at the
end of April and can take my time off then if I choose), but I also have
finals that last week of April.
Started going through my old albums which I have rarely touched except
occasionally to drag out a classical one. I found Blood on the Tracks
and played it last night. I found it very powerful. I also felt sadness
and grief as I listened, although I had just talked to Donna as well.
I spent some time last night and this morning thinking of Gainesville
and the people I knew there. I don't think anyone who didn't experience
it could understand. Were where you when the antiwar demonstrations were
going on. I was in my last year in school.[2] I
started listening to the speeches and participating. That is where I met
up with all those friends of mine who were working in the Chemistry
Dept., Luke, Linda, etc. Also, the people with whom I later moved in
were all there as well. I taught at a "free" school when I graduated,
teaching inner city youths from Jacksonville, Fl who came to Gainesville
for a special summer program. I had a private room in a big house, with
a connected bath and private entrance for 30.00 month. At the
demonstrations, one of my history professors was prominent, and after I
graduated, he and I dated for about two years. He very clumsily, and I
think unintentionally "broke my heart." I think it was probably that
early "hurt" which re-primed childhood issues and set me up for the
"disaster" and "abuse" of Fred, and probably my inability to "see" and
"accept" your love. This may be too heavy and people are coming in, but
I'm basically just waiting for the construction crews. I'll get my mail
and come back later.
[1] His name is actually spelled “Hiro”
[2] See my story about the war protest in
Gainesville.
Note subject "Blood on the Tracks" is the title of my favorite Bob's Dylan's album.
Updated: 04-02-2024