1974
Elizabeth

I had great expectations thinking that Elizabeth would spend more time with me when I had my own place when she told me she was going to the Dominica with Fred for a month.  She explained that Fred was a snail expert and was going to Dominica to collect snail specimens and he invited her to go along.  I was beginning to think of Fred more as a slug than a snail expert.  Like how could she say no, a month all expense paid vacation to Dominica, a beautiful a mountainous Caribbean island with natural hot springs and tropical rainforests, hell I would have went with Fred. Even the snail part didn’t sound all that bad. The worst part though was I knew she would be having sex with him the whole time.  My ego was crushed. I didn’t see or speak to her until she got back a month later when I wrote in my journal….

July 9, 1974

Elizabeth got back from Dominica yesterday. She’s been gone a month with Fred specimen collecting. I’ve moved. Two bedroom house.  I’ve been freaking out lately because Elizabeth has been gone. Now that she’s back is she same or changed? If changed then how does she now feel toward me? Now that I live alone will she live with me? These and other questions, such as: “Has my sex life ended?” will be answered in the next episode of the continuing story of LM in “A New Era”

The bit of humor at the end didn’t help the pain I felt.  A few days later I wrote a letter which I hadn’t intended to give her but she showed up at my place later that day and I gave it to her to read.   I’ll spare you the worst of it, here are some of the highlights…

July 11, 1974
 Friday morning

Elizabeth,   

I’m confused about things, especially things between and concerning us. But this is usual for me. ….  

You have provided me with a degree of personal relationship that I have never reached before. …  

I guess what I’m trying to say is that I’m disappointed and somewhat hurt that I have not seen enough of you lately. I was hoping that your being away for a month would not separate us any but bring us closer. ….  

I thank you for the happiness and sadness that you have bought to me. But please, please share more of yourself with me.

Her response, well she went through the letter circling all the words I misspelled with red circles.  It was almost cruel. I was in a pitiful state, thanking her for the sadness she brought me for leaving me for another lover, what was I thinking.   She stayed a several hours that day and we talked.   I thought things would be better but wasn’t all that sure.  I wrote later that night….

Been with Elizabeth tonight. Things have resolved. What the hell that means, I don’t know. But the relationship Elizabeth and I have together is unique, strange, exciting, interesting and loving. What it all boils down to is that the situation is confused as hell but things are extremely OK. Fucking Far Out.  How am I? Rotten, OK, good, bad, confused, together. Things are. I’ll get much from it. Elizabeth is something that if I could do things again I would do just the same.

Elizabeth rented a small house in Micanopy in the backyard of a large house on one of the side streets by the cemetery.   She gave me the address and I drove out to see her. By small, I mean really small, like ten by ten feet.  On one side was a counter with a hot plate, on the other a chair with a bunk bed over it. There was a door to the bathroom that was so small you had to sit on the toilet to use the sink.

While I was expanding, moving into a larger place, Elizabeth was shrinking, giving up her possessions, keeping only the essentials that would fit in such a small space.  I had offered to her to move in with me, she never said no, but her actions were clear, she needed her independence, a place of her own no matter how small. 

It turned out that her Volkswagen van broke down and she wanted me to drive her to Titusville to see her father who said he would loan her a car until she got hers fixed. We got into a big argument over something, and I got angry, stormed out and drove away.  I don’t remember what the argument was about, but I don’t anger easily, in fact I seldom get angry at all so it must have been something she said that really pissed me off.  I was halfway back to Gainesville when I calmed down enough and turned around and went back to her place.  I just couldn’t leave her there with no car, so I agreed to drive her to Titusville.  We left the next day and drove to her father’s place arriving late afternoon.  He fixed dinner for us, we stayed the night and drove back in separate cars the next day.

The following week I towed her Volkswagen van to my place and started to rebuild the engine. I had never worked on Volkswagens before, so I bought the book “Volkswagen Engines for Dummies”.  Elizabeth helped me pull the engine out and moved it to back sunroom in my house where we proceeded to tear it apart. She said she wanted to be there when I worked on the engine to see how it was done.   At first it worked out well, she would come over and we would work on it for a couple hours but then I didn’t see her for a week and I continued working on it without her.  The next time she came over she got mad that I did the work without her which pissed me off for here I was doing her a favor.  After another week we had the engine put back together and back into the van and it worked fine.